“Scary Movie”

Posted on December 28, 2012

(A #KZHS Interactive Hip-Hop Experience)

 Green Red Yel

“Scary Movie”

Lyrics by K. Ziruolo

Music: Eminem’s “Scary Movie” instrumental

(Click for music; lyrics begin at 0:10)


[Verse 1]

Let the planet sit still for seven years just like they planned it

Mountains sink into the abyss like the mast on Titanic

The Antichrist coming; are my shoes and Kanis matching?

I can tell that something’s happening cause I’m dashing from a dragon

More fire raining down than any prepper could have imagine

The Four Horsemen are here horse-backing; action packing

In a Cadillac with no roof; on doughnuts, with four flats

Spy planes and drones roaming through to scavenge the aftermath

In a haze for ten thousand days now; it’s been a sad fact

Take a step back and think about the pistol in the backpack

No carjacking or cooking up monsters in the crack shack

You come to get me; bring out an Uzi and a half-track

I heard the other day, in Oregon; bubonic plague is back

Watch your interactions; no way to get away from that

Quarantine the attic; burn your body to combat it

Meanwhile, rescue workers are in taxing all your stashes

In this new age, who’s really out buying body bags up

When you got trash bags and Saran Wrap with which to wrap em

Food Saver vacuum-seal em in plastic sacks

Gotta stay fresh and keep going, man; you’ve got to adapt

[Verse 2]

In my mind, I seeing magic like a fourth grade class did

Like a Burning Man hippie slapped my forehead with acid

New rappers are a bad itch; I’ve been dying to scratch it

I’ve fucking had it; the consequences could be tragic

Somebody explain to KZ what “disgusting use of a track” is

Nikes painted black; Ivory swooshes still intact in fact

The poacher on speed dial is currently hauling artifacts in

Faster than a rapper moving wrappers in the trap is


Steal the pipe rack off a crack addict; tell him that I have it

Like a hamster in a trap; if it shatters, watch him panic

Beat em all to death with plastic axes as a gag gift

No skinny pants sought or glitter vests been gone after


Sociopaths advancing like a dog; I mean the whole pack

Bound to happen like chest pains in a fat man’s cardiac

Rap’s commercial now; I’m taking the whole damn craft back

Everybody on “Love Sosa” now; it’s not a bad track


Take this Swisher; hit the bitch with a machete

Try to find the birth line; give a holler when it’s ready

Chop it up like tomatoes being prepped for spaghetti

Smell dro in the air; my God, it’s heavenly

The receiver on the accessory is stamped with “Century”

For treachery, I’ll sentence you; triple life in the cemetery

What’s happening to the people right now is elementary

Life isn’t fair; but then your mother never said it’d be


[Verse 3]


I’m greasy and well-connected; call me Cheeseburger Eddie

You want a Big Mac at six? You better have the money ready

Grand larceny or petty; am I interested? Heavily

Like “Shottas” when Spragga and Kymani robbed the jetty

P$C; bad-ass brick-cooking bitch named Betty

She’s deadly unfriendly and her complexion is leathery

Like Spice 1 or E-40, told her call the money fetty

Hides her black eyes better under glasses; Serengeti

Louieville Slugger; on the street you’re Derek Jeter

Before you’re picked up, double back and stash the heater

Police are on the way; you better run like at a track meet

Be sure to stick exclusively to side yards and back streets

Send one last tweet out before my account gets deleted

I’m in the cheap seats, and seeing reinforced concrete

And parents with hungry kids without a damn thing to eat

But a chopper on the loveseat; go buy some damn lunch meat

Time to close this show; running low on virtual memory

And my laptop battery is rapidly losing energy

Like 5-Hour; then I’m blasting through a kegger, G

Put Akron on the map faster than established mapmakers be


Give me an hour; hand you back a lyrical masterpiece

Humble, custom art pieces that will leave the masses pleased

147 +P’s; don’t swing your gat at me

 I might take it the wrong way; detach a part of your anatomy


The audacity with which you plan on limiting my capacity

 Knee jerk over-reaction over a televised tragedy

Is it possible to be financially stable but not happy?

Preoccupied rampantly with Xanax and Rhapsody

Scary Movie Bottom Pic xanax

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KZ/The Patriot/2013


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